The further away you are, the more we look the same. That sounds like some sort of good news for peaceniks, but what it really is—is super-inconvenient for the high-school senior trying to stand out.
Students are often led to believe that standing out in the crowded applicant pool is their goal. Is this a reasonable or doable goal? And just as important, is it really your only ticket to college entrance?
I have news for you, friend. On the whole, your life is not likely to be unusual. And the fact of the matter is—and I say this from having read the essays—if your life is unusual, it’s probably not a good thing. While there are students who do incredible things, most of the things that set apart the lives of young people involve tragedy not of their own making. (And the worst of it is, even tragedies aren’t unique In an entire country of applicants, other students have shared your struggles as well as your talents.)
I’m always intrigued when I see articles about what not to write your college essays about. “Don’t write about sports … or mission trips … or being a child of immigrants.” So if my passion were painting rather than soccer, that I could write about? What if I did service work closer to home, am I allowed to write about that? I think it’s time we give students back the permission to tell their own stories. Even if it’s not a story that no one else has ever told, your life is the only story you have. Go with it!
This year I’ve had several students arrive anxious because they’ve heard they are “not supposed to write about their activities list.” I’m not sure in what form this information is being circulated, but it’s confusing a lot of kids. No, you don’t want to write about your activities list. Your essay should not be a guided tour of your resume, or a scrapbook of your life. But this does not mean that you are not supposed to write about any of your activities.
Your activities are where you live your life. If you spend 25 hours a week at your gym, you don’t have to come up with something else to write your college essay on. You just don’t want to write the essay as a straight informational piece about your years in gymnastics.
Two things are going to set apart your “cliche” story. One is the combination of what happened and who you are—that is, the outside story and the inside story The other is your voice.
Voice is really hard to pinpoint. It’s the piece of the essay that allows readers to feel we are hearing you speak, getting a glimpse at your personality. It’s the facet of good writing that you are likely to have the least practice in, as your academic papers don’t value your personality shining through. It comes through in pacing (which you can control with punctuation) and word choice, as well as sentence structure. Do you use long introductory phrases, or interrupt yourself mid-sentence for drama, or throw in a short sentence occasionally to add punch?
Your rough draft won’t naturally be oozing with your voice—it has to be worked on like everything else in the piece. But the more open you are in your prewriting, the more likely you will be to have sparkling moments of voice pop through. So try to be open and relaxed in your early writing to get a better sense of what you really sound like.
And take heart: Does your best friend stand out? Did you pick this person after an exhaustive search of available best friend candidates, based on qualities and experiences that no other person has? Of course not. Your best friend has qualities and experiences that make them … them. As far as you’re concerned, there is no one else on earth quite like them. As much as you probably look and sound much like so many others your age—there’s still no one else quite like you, either.
If you’re sure there’s no story you can tell that won’t put admissions readers to sleep, you’re probably not giving all of your ideas a fair chance. Working with an essay coach can help you see yourself with more perspective. Schedule a free 15-minute consultation to learn more!
(Photo by Anthony DELANOIX on Unsplash)
